Sephiroth's Killing Agency!
by MateriaGirl
Summary: Who d'ya call when someone really annoying is...anoying you?! Sephy, of course! (Just don't call him that!) He kills anyone you ask of him, just ask Rufus Shinra! (CAUTION TO ALL AERIS FANS!) R&R!


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Sephiroth's Killing Agency!

=*= WARNING =*=

If you are a fan of any character in Final Fantasy 7, then I advise you, to keep the reviews about your favourite character dying, personal. No offense to any Aeris fans…NOTE: IF YOU ARE AN AERIS FAN…I EITHER ADVISE YOU NOT TO READ OR TO NOT MIND THE COMMENTS AND READ ON!…This is MateriaGirl warning you NOW! This will be your only warning! I repeat, this will be your only warning!…I think…That is all…Enjoy! ^_^

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Sephiroth twirled around in a black chair in a dark office with the only light, the sun roof. It was a rainy day in Midgar so there wasn't much sun in the sun roof. Rufus Shinra walked into the office angrily, behind him, were the Turks.

"Hello Rufus…Turks…" Sephiroth smiled.

"What seems to be the problem, Sephiroth? Ever since I defeated you, you seem so cold and pale." Rufus asked, angrily.

"I can't help it if my skin colour's grey-"

"Well, it's not!" Rufus snapped.

"IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE!!" Sephiroth raged. "EVEN YOUR BARROW-MINDED, INFESTED HENCHMEN GOT THE JOKE FASTER THAN YOUR NUMBSKULLICK BRAIN WOULD RECIEVE THE TRANSMISSION!!" Sephiroth glanced over at the Turks, evilly. The Turks soon figured out that they were supposed to laugh, so they dropped to the floor and fake laughed to death. 

"SILENCE!" Rufus snapped. "Can we get to business?"

"Yes…You said something about killing a certain…girl…" Sephiroth asked.

"Oh! Right, the girl…She has been sooo annoying! I've always hated those Cetra-" Rufus paused and looked at the angry Sephiroth. Rufus chuckled, "Oh..right…Well, I've always hated the Cetra girl…I want you…to kill her and I want her killed good, understand?" Rufus asked. He slipped a slip of paper on to Sephiroth's desk. "This is all you need to know about your new mission!"

Sephiroth picked up the paper and read it: _Sephy, I'll pay you 10,000- no! 50,000 gil per 2 hours. I want her killed in 5 days- no! 3 days! Signed, Rufus Shinra. Here is your first pay…_ Sephiroth picked up a cheque from beside the paper. Rufus and the Turks began to leave the office. Spehiroth stopped them. "One more thing."

"Yes…If it's about the pay, I'll pay you double!…If you can kill her by tomorrow that is! But-…Uh…What is it…exactly?" Rufus asked.

"Don't…ever call me Sephy…go." Sephiroth smiled.

Rufus nodded quickly and he and the Turks left.

Sephiroth smirked, "It will be a pleasure killing the girl…What's her name?…Ah…" Sephiroth brought out a picture from mid air and placed it on his desk. "Ah!…Aeris…Aeris Gainsbourough…" He snickered and cackled loudly. The sun roof broke and the rain poured through. He smiled, "Could this get anymore perfect?" Just then, lightning struck him. "Hmmm…" Then, a bunch of Materia fell through the roof and exploded his office to smitherines! Sephiroth stood in a pile of ashes, "…Whoa…" Just then, Yuffie ran in with a sack. She quickly ran up to him and gathered the last materia off of his head that didn't explode. 

"Later…" Yuffie mumbled. "Oh and if you're going to get struck by materia again, call me! I can't really run that fast!" Yuffie left the room and slammed the door…as that too, fell to the ground. Yuffie chuckled, "My bad!" Then she ran off.

Sephiroth picked up his long sword and walked out…the window, still grasping his cheque and the picture of Aeris…

Meanwhile, the soon-to-be-killed Aeris Gainbourough was travelling across the Gongaga Area. It was pretty windy and pretty cold. "I've always hated outings like this…Oh well! I'll make the best of-"

"Hold it right there, Miss Gainsbourough!" 

Aeris turned around to see Elena, from the Turks pointing a hand gun at Aeris. 

"Oh! Look, a Turk-…Wait! Whad'dya doing here?" Aeris asked.

Elena put down her gun, hastily and walked up to Aeris. "I've been informed that I should inform you that Sephiroth is after you! And that if you don't want to be killed by him, you should move your flower picking butt!" Elena explained. "Sephiroth doesn't take no for an answer!"

"…Oh…" Aeris sighed. "Thanks for telling me! Bye now!" She began to skip into the distance.

"Wait a second! Aren't you the slightest bit curious? The slightest bit- oh let's say…TERRIFIED?" Elena asked. "You know, Sephiroth with the large sword and the wicked grey hair?"

"I know who Sephiroth is!…But I'm not afraid because he's been trying to kill me ever since! People have been hiring Sephiroth to kill me…I guess they just all think I'm annoying-"

"Right you are, my…enemy!" Elena began to walk away. "Don't let me warn you again…" She quickly hopped into a helicopter and took off, leaving Aeris, still walking in the Gongaga area.

Sephiroth was running all around the Temple of the Ancients trying to find Aeris. He grumbled, "IF SHE'S AN ANCIENT, WHY CAN'T SHE BE AT THE TEMPLE OF THE ANCIENTS?!? IT'LL MAKE MY JOB A HECK OF A LOT MORE EASIER!!" He still circled it, a lot of times and found no trace of Aeris…although she was IN the temple itself!

Aeris was walking around a few stone altars. "I've been trying to talk to the planet for months now! It's not working!" She sighed, hopelessly. She walked out of the temple, discouraged. 

Sephiroth spotted her and grinned, "At long last…we meet again, Aeris Gainsbourough…"

"If you want me dead, you're gonna have to find me…again!" Aeris brought out a ball of red materia.

"Summon…materia?" Sephiroth squeaked, nervously.

"Yeah, that's right!" Aeris soon came to her pose and yelled out, "_Whether you come from Earth, wind water or sky, I summon thee so hear my cry!…_Shiva, Creature of the sky, I summon you! Diamond Dust!" Just then, a fairy like, ice angel came from the sky, dressed in a flashy red outfit, surrounded by an icy glow and silver crystals. "Shiva, I want you to demolish this creep! And as soon as you do, return to-"

"ME!" Snapped a tired teenage voice. Sephiroth and Aeris turned around to see Yuffie, Miss Materia Hunter, dragging a large potato sack full of materia. "I…have been searching for that….Shiva….since I was…9…I heard it was….one of the best…summon materia….around…" Yuffie puffed, still dragging the sack. "I…want it…"

"Really? You think I'm rare?" Shiva gasped. "It'd be a pleasure to go with you!" She walked up to Yuffie.

"WHAT?! WHAT ABOUT ME?!" Aeris snapped. "What about my needs?"

"You don't wanna die with this here materia on your hands, now do ya?" Yuffie asked grinning.

"How do you know that Sephiroth wants to kill me?" Aeris asked.

"Because!" Yuffie began. "Because he's right behind you grinning like mad, holding his sword up to your neck!"

"Huh? Huh…Huh! AAAAHHH!!!" Aeris dodged out the way, shocked.

Shiva looked restlessly at Yuffie. "Aren't we going to help her?" She asked.

"Well…only for one second! But other than that, you are STILL my materia!" Yuffie sighed. "Go Shiva!…Diamond Dust!"

"I won't give up until the girl is dead!" Sephiroth snickered, chasing after Aeris, his sword in one hand.

"Help me!…Please Yuffie!" Aeris begged.

"I just did! I sent Shiva after Sephiroth…But I didn't want to help you or anything! Don't get me wrong…I-I-I…I was just…I JUST FELT LIKE IT, OKAY?!" Yuffie snapped, the pressure dropping off her shoulders.

"Oh…Well…thank you…Yuffie…" Aeris mumbled. "I guess…"

"It's gonna have to cost ya!" Yuffie smirked.

"Uh…How about…100 gil…200 gil…My materia?" Aeris asked.

"Deal! How about…a…Kjata?…"Yuffie asked. 

"But I don't have Kjata!…Uh…give me time! I'm sure I'll find it!" Aeris stammered.

Yuffie smirked, "Too late now! Shiva, don't attack Sephiroth!"

"Huh?" Shiva stopped in her tracks.

"Attack Aeris!" Yuffie then pointed to Aeris.

"NO!" Sephiroth snapped. "I'm getting paid for this job…Shiva, Yuffie…It shall be my pleasure…" Sephiroth began to walk up to Aeris, his long sword in one hand. "Say goodbye…"

Aeris gulped, "WHAT? NO-"

…THE END…

(I bet you already know what happened…::smirks deviously:: )


End file.
